Akuma - Being Nice???????
by Slim Gohan
Summary: Akuma. Helping out people? You have to read to belive


Akuma - Being Nice?????  
  
  
  
Disclaimers - I don't own them, Capcom does.  
I be the rich if i did though  
Wish I had a funny disclaimer to  
throw out, but I don't. C'est La Vie.  
  
  
Summary - Akuma was ... well.....being Akuma, when a little  
girl asks him for help starts off a chain of events  
with Akuma helping others.......  
  
So here goes my first Street Fighter II attempt.......  
  
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One day, Akuma was doing....well..what he usually does. He was medating in the forest, thinking of  
ways he could get stronger and thinking how he could kill Ryu. He was deep in though when.....  
  
"HELP! HELP! SOMEONE HELP ME!"  
The girl spotted Akuma. "MISTER! WILL YOU HELP ME?"  
Akuma opened his eyes. "Go fuck yourself little girl."  
"Mister please help me? Pretty Plaese with a cherry on top?" She looked at him with the most  
powerful weapon a child could weild........The dreaded Bambi eyes.  
"No...Not those...must use...evil...to resist...Shun...Goku..Sast..fine I'll help. Damn Bambi eyes."  
"Thank you Mister! Can you get my cat off my roof?" "WHAT?!?!?! I WILL FUCKING KILL..." She gave the  
Bambi eyes again. "Damn. Fine. Let's go." "YAYYYYY!!!" "Just shut up." "Ok, mister, my house is this way."  
The little girl lead Akuma to her house. As the girl said the cat was on the roof. It was a nice grey tabby,  
and it was scared as hell. "There he is Mister...." "Akuma, you little ass. Akuma." "Ok Mr.Ass he's.."  
"IT'S AKUMA YOU STUPID BITCH!!!!" "Ok, Mr.Akuma. He's up there, please get him down!" "Fine." Akuma teleported  
on the roof, grabbed the cat, and teleported off. He gave the cat to the girl. "THANK YOU MISTER AKUMA!!!" She took  
the cat and skipped off. "Damned brat, should of killed her when I had the chance." Akuma began to walk off when,   
"SOMEONE HELP MY FATHER IS TRYING TO RAPE M...." "SHUT UP YOU INGREATFUL BRAT!!!" If there are three things Akuma  
hates they would be Ryu, Justin Timberlake, and rapists. Also bad parents and tofu rank up there. Akuma teleported  
to the house and found the father about to rip his daughter's bra off. Akuma was shocked at this. So he just....  
  
"SHAKUNETSU HADOUKEN!!!!"   
  
The Red Hadouken blasted the father to hell. The girl was very thankful to the evil one. "Thank you sir, I owe you my  
life." "So you're fine? Well have a good life then." "Wait I didn't catch you're name..." "Akuma, miss. Good bye."  
Akuma teleported outta there and went along walking.  
  
Akuma was walking along the Alantic Ocean (It's beyond me how he got there) when he heard....  
  
"MY BABY'S DROWNING! SOMEONE PLEASE HELP MY BABY!!!" Akuma, for no reason went into the ocean and saved the baby.   
"Here you go you stupid baka." "Thank you for saving my baby!" "Go to hell." "I owe you my life!" "Bitch please."  
"Well, thank you kindly Mr...." "Akuma." "Mr.Akuma, well thank you again. I must go." "Yeah, get stoned. I'm gone."  
Akuma teleported outta there. "I hate being nice."  
  
Akuma was walking along the streets of New York when.....  
  
"PLEASE HELP I'M BEING ROBBED!"   
  
Akuma looked around the corner and an old lady was being beat up and robbed by some punks with mohawks. Akuma hated  
people with mohawks (Think Birdie), so he decided to help. Akuma jumped in and Hurricane Kicked them all out cold.  
"Thank you kind sir." "Get some tic-tacs. Your breath smells like a monkey shit in your mouth." "What do I owe you Mr.."  
"Akuma." "Akuma, here you can have this lollypop." Akuma took the lollypop, took one of the punks and shoved it up his ass.  
"I'm going now, I'll see you in hell you old bag." "Bye now you sweet young man." Akuma got outta there.  
  
  
Akuma was walking around in France looking for a fight worthy of his skills, when...  
  
"FIRE! FIRE!" Akuma looked up and saw a fire in a nearby building. Akuma slowly walked to the building, looked at it and laughed,   
when.....  
  
"Sir can you help?" "Why?" "Becuse there are human lives that depend on you to put out that fire." "But...I'm evil! I don't care if  
they die." "I knew the city of Nice could count on you." "Shit, what do I do?" "Put out the fire!" "But how? You're the fireman! You tell me!"  
"I'll be damned if I know, your on your own." Akuma though for a second, then he teleported out and came back with the white girl, and black guy  
from Captain Planet. "Please put out the fire or I give you a slow and painful death." "Ye-e-es s-sir" "Good." "EARTH!" "WATER!"  
Soon the fire was put out. Akuma kicked the black guy in the nuts, and knocked the white girl out. He pushed them both to the side. The fireman ran  
up. "Thank you Mr..." "Akuma, now go fuck yourself you stupid asshole cocksucker." "Bless You!" Akuma walked away.  
  
  
Akuma was walking around Washington D.C. when.....  
  
"ACHOOOO!!!!! I HATE THIS FUCKING COLD!!!"  
  
Akuma walked over to the guy. "Here take this you stupid assramer." Akuma handed the man a drink he made appear outta nowhere.  
"Thanks." The man downed the drink, and *POOF* "Hey! My cold's gone!!...You just found the cure to the common cold! Mr..."  
"Akuma" "What did you put in this?" "Badger piss, a lougie, an old slice of anchovie pizza, and some cherries for flavor!"   
"Hey! Thanks Mr.Akuma! I'll tell the Government right now!!!" "Ok, go suck Dick Chany's dick too you shithead." "Will Do!"  
"Stupid fool." Akuma walked away.  
  
Akuma was walking around in Toyko when.........  
  
"I NEED HELP! I BROKE MY ANKLE!" Akuma walked over to a girl who was clutching her ankle very tight. "Can you help me get to a   
hospital Mr...." "Akuma." "Can you? I'm hurt very bad." "If you stop bitching." Akuma picked the girl up and teleported to the nearest  
hospital, checked her in, and left. "Needtokillsomeone,needtookillsomeone...there!" He looked at Sodom.   
  
  
"SHUN....GOKU....SASTU!!!!!!"  
  
Akuma pulled the move off, and Sodom fell. Guile and Cammy saw it and said......  
  
"Oh My God! He Killed Sodom!"  
"You Bastard!" Then they walked off.  
  
Akuma, proud with his kill, walked off and disappeared.  
  
  
THE NEXT DAY  
  
Ryu and Chun-Li were having breakfast when Ryu looked at the newspaper, and fainted.  
Chun-Li looked at the paper and saw......  
  
"MAN FINDS CURE FOR COMMON COLD, HELPS A YOUNG GIRL GET HER CAT, SAVES A BABY, STOPS A RAPE, PUTS OUT A FIRE, HELPS AN OLD LADY  
AND MAKES A GREAT CHEESE PIZZA!" There on the front was a picture of Akuma. A lesser headline said "Akuma to recive Nobel Peace Prize."  
Chun-Li also fainted.   
  
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WELL THERE, LIKE IT? HATE IT? DON'T REALLY HAVE AN OPINION ABOUT IT? THEN REVIEW IT! UNTIL NEXT TIME  
AND WATCH MOBLE SUIT GUNDAM:THE 08TH MS TEAM ON TOONAMI!  
(ALSO READ MY STORY PICCOLO'S LITTLE STRESS FREE VACATION IN THE DRAGONBALL Z SECTION) - LATER!  



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